thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
