dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Randomize
