This girl is more easily done than said...
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
