I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Randomize
