Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
how drunk are you?
Several
Randomize
