exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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