There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I didn't notice because vodka
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
