using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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