one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Randomize
