In the future we'll all be gay
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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