ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize