Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Randomize
