I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
