So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize