bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
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