PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Randomize
