Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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