brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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