This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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