I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I'm going to jail i love you
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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