goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
