i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
