I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
