Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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