Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Of course I have a pirate flag
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Randomize
