i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
