in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Let's get the cat blown out
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
