i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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