Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Randomize
