We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
