Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
My bed smells like the plague
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
