I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize