What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize