Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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