dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
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