How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
