Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
