I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize