I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
