Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
