That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
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