the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
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