my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize