what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Randomize
