how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
