Don't you send me to vm
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
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