Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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