addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize