Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
