I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
false alarm. still invincible.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
