okay pat passed out under dana's car
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
